because it comes out in bits and pieces. the house is not ready to host a life. no sense in rushing into it. everything seems important. everything feels like it needs to happen. like time is slipping away. but it can happen in bits and pieces. over time. thats okay.
you listen to a podcast and get inspired thinking 'I could do that'. podcast ends and you forget. you have these great ideas. you hold hand for a moment, and you want more. things come to fruition bit by bit even when they seemingly happen all at once. everything has its journey. cause, effect, effect, effect. bits and pieces.
destruction, too, is a process. catastrophe is only the culmination. when an elephant dies in the forest, a whole ecosystem thrives. if the universe strives for uncertainty, what better way to create unpredictability than through life and death and grief and love and loss? sentience is the ultimate chaos agent, building disorder in bits and pieces.
decisions at scales unheard of yet so meaningless. oh, for all our chaos to contribute nothing but a bit of data. so why rush headlong into destruction? let us destroy ourselves in bits and pieces.
chipping away at the soft bits, the hard bits, everything that wants to fall away. I let it fall. leave a trail of shards and shrapnel and shedding. I'm shedding. Always bit by bit. selves, skin, its all coming off. tears, love. take a chisel to me and make me other that i may keep discovering me forever.